Well, the whole maid thing would have gone away, if not for the agency. Once I was pregnant, I had quickly messaged the confinement nanny who had done my first confinement to "chope" her and booked her through the agency as well. When they came by to firm up the paperwork (and to collect the deposit), they mentioned that they had branched out into domestic helpers for infants and household care, and if they could send us the dropbox link to view the resumes online. So we said yes. I had also received quotations from other agencies but we had to make an appointment to head down to their office. Given Andrew's working hours on weekdays and weekends being very precious, I wasn't very motivated to make the appointment to go down to the agency. But for PEM, they had the resumes online in a dropbox, so we just reviewed online. The Philippines side agent was also very persistent in her follow up, calling us to arrange for FaceTime interview with their maids. So we shortlisted two, and interviewed both of them.
Our criteria for a helper was that she must be married and have kids, with kids older than 5 years. Reason was that we didn't want a maid that was too young and unattached, then they may have the "holiday" mentality and want to go look for boyfriend instead. Having a family would also give the maid more motivation, like the reason for her coming to Singapore to earn money, and hopefully make her more responsible towards carrying out the contract. As we have kids, preferably it would be good for her to like kids as well, though taking care of kids was not her priority (at that time). However, we didn't want her to have kids that were too young, as they may get easily homesick.
So after the interview, we selected R, feeling that she is more sincere. Six or seven weeks later, she arrived in Singapore. She joined us in early August, towards the end of my second trimester when I was expecting Leanne. It was National Day that week, so I took the whole week off to orientate her. It was also her birthday the day before she joined us, so we got a cake to celebrate. Her main focus was on household chores and cooking dinner for us. So I showed her around our house, explained how to use each appliance and which detergents/ cleaning agents were for bathtub/ toilet/ tiles/ glass/ windows/ etc. I also brought her to my sister-in-law, and we went to the wet market to learn how to buy raw food, and how to pack it in the freezer. (I have never stepped into a wet market before, and the only food I buy is cooked food. I know how to cook pre-marinated beef - like heat 5 mins each side done - and rice.) My sister-in-law also lent her some recipe books, which my helper was very hardworking to read and apply. I also brought her to the public library when I went to borrow books for myself and Emma, and she borrowed some recipe books as well.
Her daily job scope was to vacuum and mop the house, and a rotation of chores. You can find the schedule here. For her own laundry, she uses the washing machine. We wash our clothes separately, meaning rather than everyone's clothes for the day is washed together, today wash my clothes, tomorrow wash Andrew's clothes, next day kids clothes, next day her clothes, next day bedsheets/ towels, and so on. Andrew prefers it that way. For me I don't care either way, after all the washing machine is meant to clean everything out of the clothes isn't it?
We also ensure that she has enough rest during the day and at night. Once she finishes her chores for the day, which honestly she can probably finish by 1pm, have lunch, then she's free onwards from 2pm or so. Her busy period is the morning chores, and in the evening from 5pm when she starts cooking for dinner till about 9.30pm as that is the period we are at home. After all, she cannot be continually working from morning to night.
For her HP, we gave it to her immediately on the first day when the agent passed it to us. Andrew is someone who is addicted to his phone, like go toilet also must bring phone. So we figure it is good for her to keep her phone as she will also need it. We bought her the SIM card so she can make a call home and tell her family that she is safe, but once the original value is used up, subsequent top-ups will be on her own account. We also want her to be able to keep in touch with her family. Family is very important and is good for her not to feel isolated. After a few months, her HP gave her some problems. We had a spare iPhone 3Gs, so we lent it to her to use. We didn't give it to her, cos it has sentimental value for Andrew. We allow her to hook up to our wifi at home, and she brings it out when we go out, sometimes to take pictures as well. I must say she is also very automatic on her part, and doesn't abuse this. I have never seen her use it when doing chores or when she is with us. She usually uses it during her rest time and at night. She does make sure that the kids are settled or there's nothing to do, then she will use her phone to play games or surf Facebook.
Before #2 came along, she was alone at home during the day. Andrew and I went to work, while Emma was in school. We installed security cameras (will post another entry on that) just in case, more as a preventive measure in case she let some men into the house (heard about a friend's maid who let her boyfriend into the house and he subsequently used it to threaten her after sleeping with her, like he blackmailed her saying he would tell her employer if she didn't give him money). But honestly, during this period, I didn't really check the camera as I didn't have time. Like maybe will check once or twice a week. We didn't opt for the recording function because firstly we couldn't get it to work, and secondly we wouldn't have time to review all the footage anyway. Now that Leanne is at home, I use it see Leanne. Most of the time, Leanne is "bullying" my poor helper, insisting to be carried and must stand and carry, not allowing people who carry her to sit. We installed cameras in our living room, bedroom and wardrobe, but not in the study where R sleeps.
Within a month, she got settled in and took over the chores. I let her manage her own time, as long as the chores are done, she doesn't have to follow the schedule. She does take initiative, and cleans the kids' toys and play area in the morning. She will tell me when certain items are running out, like detergent or bath foam, and I will buy them the next time we went grocery shopping. After about 2-3 months, we started trusting her more, like we would give her money to buy the groceries on her own during the day. She does have easy access to the spare set of keys, as we just leave it on the ledge of the shoe cabinet. She will place the receipt and the change on the shoe cabinet as well. In fact, we leave our bags and wallets in the living room and have not found anything missing. We kind of took it for granted, until one of my friends mentioned that her maid will sneak into her room when they are home to steal their money. I was like why does she need to sneak into her room, then my friend said they kept their wallets and valuables in their room.
Now, she settles all the household chores and cooking. She also packs Emma's bag and washes all her bottles. Emma's milk powder is also quite complicated, as we mix few brands of FM (2 types at any one time, but we give her Nan, Similac, Dumex, Enfa), but she can keep track of how much to prepare. Sometimes when I forget certain things to pack, (like the first time we went swimming, forgot to bring swim diapers, first time went out with Leanne forgot to bring nursing cover), she will take note and remind me the next time, like Mam need to bring xxx? Then I will be like yes thank you! I'm grateful she remembers.
As for the kids, our direction to her was to focus on chores and cooking. However, she likes kids and takes the effort to play with Emma. She is also very patient and helps to feed Emma, shower Emma and also to change her diapers. Before I gave birth, our plan for Leanne was to put her in IFC, in fact we had already registered and paid the deposit. However during my confinement, she took the initiative to learn from my confinement nanny, not just on cooking, but also on taking care of Leanne. Her cooking improved leaps and bounds during our time with Fen Jie. She also bonded quite well with Leanne, and would miss Leanne more than Emma when she went on her off days. Thus when I went back to work, I placed Leanne in her care. I told her as well, just focus on Leanne, no need to bother about chores. But she will vacuum and mop when Leanne sleeps. I asked her if she can cook with Leanne around, and she said she can handle. If Leanne is being super koala bear, just give us a call and we will pack dinner so she doesn't have to cook. But so far, for the past month, she has not done so. Sometimes she will tell us apologetically that there's no soup for dinner because Leanne was fussy, and we tell her it's ok, got dinner very good already.
We have a good dynamic going, we treat her as how we would want our boss to treat us, and she is also a responsible helper who takes initiative to do more than what we expect. I'm quite thankful that we were fortunate to have her.
